Okay. So I’m gay. But I have slept with men. And I did sleep with one recently. Why?

Because of him. Just him. I think I’m almost in love with him. Well, that sounds a little silly and juvenile, but it’s meant to get the point across a bit?

I wrote about this before but I’m on my mobile with my shit WP app so no linking. Category?

I “lost” him after we first met but “found” him again. Silly me. I gave him my mobile number but never got his. He works crazy hours, but still nothing.

What did I do wrong?

Now that I found him? He told me I didn’t do anything wrong. He’s more insecure than me!

I don’t know what’s going on. Ironically I responded to a comment on my blog today basically saying to hell with labels.

I don’t care about that at all right now! Just my feelings.

And if we are going to have sex we have to deal with my fibroids. When we did, I bled and was in severe pain for two days afterward.

So, hey. Maybe I’ll be dating a guy? Or we’ll just be really intimate friends.

It doesn’t help that he’s fucking gorgeous too. Like “Model Gorgeous.”

But his other traits cancel that out completely.

How do I find myself in these situations of the heart over and over again?

Posted via WordPress Application for Android. Let’s see if it actually works.


  1. Mark

    Because, PA, you’re human. You don’t hide your feelings. You give yourself, not because you like to have your heart broken, but out of the most natural desire for intimate(whether sexual or emotional)human connection. And analyzing or OVER analyzing will make you anxious, depressed, worried and unable to enjoy whatever is happening in that moment with that person. All we have is that moment. Nothing else is promised or guaranteed. So, strive to be gentle with yourself. From one imperfect person to another.

    Mark




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