Thanks, Nana…Goodbye, Again…

Well, my grandmother’s (“Nana’s”) estate has finally been settled. Almost exactly 3 months to the date of her death. I never, ever thought I would receive any sort of “inheritance” in my life. Mind you it’s not a huge amount. Hardly! Patient Anonymous does not come from wealth.

My Nana (she absolutely refused to be called “Grandma” or any other variation of the term as she felt it made her feel “old”) was a rather vain woman. As you can probably gather from the previous statement. She was always very fashionable, lived life to it’s fullest potential and was actually very self-absorbed. However, she did have a sensitive flip side and she did not ever like to see anyone in pain or suffer. This I gradually started to find out only recently as she and I started to grow closer. You see, I began to inch quietly like a bit of a snake (albeit a frustrated and defiant one) in rattling some of the family’s, closeted skeletal bones about my secret biological paternity. I had somehow hoped that she would have some sort of influence over me obtaining more information about the man I know nothing about from my completely delusional mother who is in absolute denial about it all.

My Nana’s sole “wish” was that we could all be closer as a family. Perhaps my Nana was a bit delusional as well.

However, she is gone now. I must somehow try and tackle the problem of dealing with my mother on this issue alone. I don’t know how successful I will be. I have major “mother issues”…primarily dealing with abandonment but it doesn’t stop there.

Anyway, at least this hurdle is done with. And my sister and I are relieved that my mother didn’t actually abscond with our shares in some psychotic episode. I’m not joking. We were actually a little fearful that might happen as she was the Executrix.

I feel conflicted about this. Someone dying and taking their money. “Bittersweet” is the only word that immediately comes to mind but even that doesn’t seem to encompass all that I feel.

  1. sisiphus

    I understand “Bittersweet” sentiments. It is a very good word to describe them. I’ve just never thought of that analogy.
    Thinking, thinking, thinking…



  2. The Angry Medic

    Awww..hang in there, PA. Am glad you’ve decided to talk to your momma, it’s the only way to settle things. Good luck, and take a very large rolled-up newspaper in case things turn ugly.


  3. Patient Anonymous

    Hi Sis: Thank you. Um, yes…lots of thinking going on here indeed…eternally?

    Why hello angry medic! I haven’t seen you here before! Thank you for stopping by and for blogrolling me. I promise to check you out at some later point when I can try to shove all of the grey matter that is slowly seeping out of my ears back into my head.

    Not that this has anything to do with this post but I have been to Cambridge and I fell in love with several of the parts of the university that I had a chance to see. Absolutely marvellous.

    Thank you for your kind words. See my next post for the “fallout” haha.


  4. sodajerk

    i have an evil aunt who changed the will of my gran so me and my brutha got nothing.
    when it had been ma grans plan that the flat was split between the 4 grandchildren.
    when ma gran was kinda out of it near the end,she got her to change the will.

    did i mention she is a staunch churchgoer and despises all those who sin?

    i know for a fact her man has been playin away for years so i think this is her karmic comeback.

    and in the local paper last week(she lives in a very posh and exclusive neighbourhood)turns out some folks are runnin a brothel about 2 doors away……..their goes the property value.


  5. Hey sodajerk, that’s terrible. So much crap can go on with peoples’ Wills and Estates either before or after they die. I work with a woman who really went through sheer hell with her sisters after their mother died–or so she told me anyway. Lots of arguing over who got what and so forth.

    My Nana’s Estate was rather simple so it wasn’t too difficult to manage from a Will perspective–again, we just a little worried about my Mother’s mental state(!)

    As far as possessions, that was another matter. Going to my Nana’s apartment and dealing with all of that. Ugh. Again, it didn’t go too badly. No fisticuffs between my Mother, sister and I. We all just decided what we all wanted and if something was really important to someone that was fine.

    Yes, karmic retribution indeed re: your aunt? That’s why PA always tries to be sweet and nice to everyone she knows haha.


  1. 1 Patient Anonymous: Just Another Head Case Extended Vacation «

    […] decided to spend the remainder of her inheritance that she received from her mother recently (and maybe a little bit more haha.)  So she bought a […]


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