Archive for August 2nd, 2008

Okay, let me try and explain why last night’s post was a two-liner piece of craptastic, completely, downerama, uninspired, uncreative… Okay, you get it.

*PA reaches for wee, baby MacBook remote for some (i)Tunage…*

Yesterday morning I awoke from a terrible dream. As I have oft repeated, I do not remember my dreams either very well or often. This dream was about Mozart, my cat that died last year. I have dreamt of him…a couple of times since he died that I do remember but maybe more times than I haven’t recalled?

I was going on a flight. It was a long flight and I had to take him. No question. There was no way I could leave him behind. I have read about people that have bought extra plane tickets for their pets so they don’t have to make them go down into the storage hold but there was no way I could have done that! Poor Mo. He absolutely hated carriers!

Bala, my girl that I had with him as well (she died later and then it was just the two of us), was so mellow. I probably could have lugged her around in a paper bag. But Mozart? Wow!

So, I was just FUH-LIPPIN’ with a capital with a capital “FUH!” I was so scared he would be terrified himself and/or worse, suffer permanent psychological damage–even DIE! God, down there all by himself as the plane was all rockin’ and rollin’! I mean, I’m a fine passenger on a plane but my poor baby!

It was just an awful dream. A fucking nightmare.

I woke up in my typical haze, albeit a bit shaken and went about my regular business. Meds, some breakfast. Started fixing my tea. It was then, I realised. It hit me like a truck.

It was this weekend, last year, that he died. Funny (or not!) how our brains can play tricks on us when we’re not aware (our subconscious) or when we’re not paying attention (when we are awake.)

I made my tea and went out for a cigarette, fighting back tears all the way. Of course, I lost the battle. So I just sat outside and let them fall. For a little while. I tried not to remember it all but how could I not forget? It was brutal and I won’t write about it to spare all of the pet owners out there; all of the animal lovers. Suffice it to say that, “I found him” and he was not sick. He showed no signs of illness all day, nor at all for any significant time prior.

You know, if it wasn’t for that dream, I would have sailed through this weekend and never even remembered. I have so much going on, so many things on my mind… And still. Even if I didn’t. I’d be willing to wager that if I still didn’t have that dream, I wouldn’t have remembered.

So yes. I was completely buggered yesterday and am still feeling down. I got nothing accomplished yesterday and have done nothing today either. Well, a bit of laundry…barely?

Maybe some stuff tomorrow?

So that’s the reason why the post was so brief and I really couldn’t say much. Not to mention I also had to drag myself out to…fucking “take care of Escher!”

Again…I’m not listening to my own advice again. I’m not taking care of myself when I need to.

I met up with J. tonight to review his bio and to shoot his picture.  All seems good but a bit more review on his part.  No point in going into why as that would be another post altogether!

So if anything, this post is one for Blog365!


I need to get this up for Blog365 at least if it is a boring post.  I met up with J. today and we reviewed the bio.  I shot him despite his loathing for having his picture taken.  I have done it before so it’s not so bad but it did take some time.  We finally settled on one but…

Well, no point in getting into the entire evening of all that we talked about.  That would be a very lengthy post.  Suffice it to say he was so much more loathe to have his picture taken!

So I need to finish off that work now.