NOTE: I wrote this a while back.  Some time ago…

I was thinking about jealousy the other day.  Maybe even feeling it? And no, it wasn’t because I was wearing my green scrubs!

“…Scrubs Slut…Scrubs Slut…”

“…REDRUM…REDRUM…”

If you don’t understand that (or anything else on this crazy blog) just ask.  However, I fear with the above (Scrubs Slut…) I’m going to have to add a permanent disclaimer?

So was I feeling some kind of “jealousy(?)” because I was a bit down and depressed? My moods gone a bit wonky? Well, although we like to think as mental cases, we’re a classy and chic little clique, jealousy isn’t purely ours to own.  NTs feel it too.  It is a human emotion–just like all others.

No one likes to admit it but they can be “jealous people.”  Or at the very least, they can become jealous! I can (be)come very jealous.  I think for me, perhaps, it happens when I feel threatened…by a loss? Well, that is one way it has come out.

It’s really surprised me at times, as well! I so often think of myself as this free spirited, live and let live, “Groove on Baby” kind of person but…  I guess it just shows that no one (at least moi!) is immune to the vast spectrum of all the emotions that humanity has to offer and how they can exhibit themselves.

And what of envy? God (no pun intended) I sound like I’m about to start working my way through “The Seven Deadly Sins.”

Envy can definitely be jealousy’s intimate bedfellow.  I don’t know how that works for me very well.  I am always genuinely happy, thrilled even, when something good happens to or for someone else.  I don’t say: “Oh, well! I wish I could be so lucky!” That’s crap.

I think (apart from me really being happy for everyone else) it’s because I’ve seen so many other people’s lives turn into big piles of reeking mounds of horseshit in about 10 seconds.  And I’m right there with them, holding their hand–just when something good happens too.  For better or worse, right?

So, no.  I really don’t feel envious of what others may “have” and what “I don’t have.”  Another cliche? The grass is always greener, right?

I’m not hooked up to baby MacBook right now.  No, just scratching this down with a pen on a notepad.  As a result, no fancy pants, psychological research can PA do.

Theoretically, all of our emotions should serve a purpose, correct? Well, I certainly think so.  Jealousy? What might it do for us? What purpose might it serve?

As I said above, I thought it manifested itself for me when I felt a loss was imminent.  Going back in time, some instinct to maintain one’s territory? Moving forward…? Perhaps some vestigial trait to do the same? However, we have “supposedly” evolved.  Maybe not so much.

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