Dr. PA Who is NOT a M.D.!!!


TRIGGER! WARNING! DON’T DO THIS!

This might ring a few bells from the past and it’s going to be categorized under “Cutting” anyway  but as per the above.  Please! Pay Attention!

For the first time in my life, I actually stood in my hallway outside the bathroom and pondered doing a cutting.  My cuttings have always been very impulsive.

Well, I am writing this and I don’t think any of you are idiots so…  Decision made.  Incision made.

Let’s just say, I “did” what I did before out of necessity but it wasn’t as severe.  I know, I’m being an arse and some of you may be wondering what the fuck I am talking about!

When I did my last cutting, I sutured it myself.  Yes.  Very extreme and again, I can not repeat it enough, never, ever try and do this yourself! It may sound hypocritical but I know how to do it, I did it as best I could and I was fine.  And this time, I will be as well.

I have been under extreme, emotional circumstances and I did not want things to get this far but they did.  Sometimes as someone who self-harms…it can just happen.  It’s not like I wanted it to.

Just like the last, I am sure I will be able to remove my sutures tomorrow and the cut will be fine for Steri-strips.

However, none of you…none of you do this!

Some people may think, why are you making his post? It’s so “triggery” and you might just “give people ideas?”

No.  This is my blog and I can blog about my pain. It is just like anything anyone else can read elsewhere.  I have given enough warnings and cautions both here and before, the first time.

Not to mention, I don’t think a lot of cutters would have either the acumen or the stomach to do it anyway.  That is not meant as an insult, I just think it may be true.

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  1. raginggenius

    No wonder I have been thinking about you all week. Usually when someone is on my mind for more than 3 days in a row they are hurting or in some kind of bind. You must be a bit devastated? I know don’t know, cutting isn’t something I know anything about. I can only imagine that you must be in an incredible amount of pain to harm your self in that way. Thinking of you, Sincerely, The Raging Genius.

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  2. Hi raginggenius, good to see you! It’s been a while. So nice that I have been on your mind as well–although not so great for the reasons of which you speak.

    Indeed, I have not been well. However, in time…?

    I wanted to jump on your comment as I was in the middle of one post and then I thought about what I did and decided to make a post about cutting and some psychology about it–at least as far as why I did what I did.

    So you may wish to come back and read that?

    Thanks so much and again, good to see you back. I hope things are going well with you?

    PA

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  3. raginggenius

    After going through some hormonal hell from having a baby, I am a little bit more stable. My mom has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Other than that I am doing pretty good.

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  4. Hi raginggenius. Somehow you went into my Spam but at least I got you! Well, I hope you’re feeling somewhat better now but I’m really sorry about your mom.

    Keep trying to hang on. Again, that’s all we can do, right?

    Hugs,
    PA

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  5. raginggenius

    Hugs, TRG :)

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  6. Hi raginggenius, right back at ya!

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  7. raginggenius

    Dang yer quick!

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  8. Hey raginggenius, well…I am online right now but with a dodgy, remote, wifi connection. Getting some drops but I did manage to get through to you!

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