I just got off the phone with my friend P.  We have been playing telephone tag for some time now.  We talked for ages and needed to bring each other up to date–especially in light of me just being hospitalized.  For those that don’t know, I met him during my hospitalization before this last one–about two years ago.

Apart from all the goss, well, fuck.  I took him up to where I am taking you with “The Chronicles.”  We were exchanging “stories” of ill treatment from so called “Professionals” and something odd happened.  It all came back.  Even though I have it written down, when I was “verbally” expressing it…WHAM!

This was toward the end of our phone call and I started to go…  Voice trailing off, getting shaky…  P. could tell and apologized for the Trigger.  I told him that it wasn’t his fault.  I was stuttering by the time we ended and said goodbye.

Guess who has gone non-verbal now? Guess who has such a muddled head (more than before) that she can’t get anything straight in her mind? Guess who feels completely nauseous? Guess who has just taken a Valium/Diazepam to try and calm her fraying/ed nerves?

I know…I keep going on about “The Chronicles.”  More bloody linkbaiting for all of you.  I’m not doing it intentionally. *PA looks at notepad* There are only two days left.  Maybe I should just write up both and be done with it all.  However, it will probably be fairly long reads for everyone.  Nonetheless, you will finally understand why the whole ordeal was so completely devastating for me.

What I have written up to this point hasn’t really shown any of that.  I suppose only the business about how they messed up all of my meds? Only that degree of incompetence and lack of professionalism?

Well, I feel bad about continually keeping everyone in suspense.  I’ll try and write everything up now…crap.

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