This thought came to me today.  In a rather abstract fashion?

Actually, pretty much everything’s rather “abstract” in my world, right now.  I’ve found myself in quite a state (again.)  And so it goes…? Indeed.  If only it didn’t have to go…anywhere? Except away! I’m working on that, though.  I’m fucking drowning, and if I don’t start yanking every last stubborn, strand out of my being, I’m not gonna make it! I need to gain some goddamn clarity, and I need do it now! I need to “extract” the “abstract.”

So, that thought up there? Did I manage to extract anything from it? Well, I do know I am capable of crossing other peoples’ boundaries.  I can’t count the number of times I’ve done it! Unintentionally, of course.  Nonetheless, the deed has been done; the consequences suffered.

Arguably, some of the worst transgressions one could do to another would be to lie, cheat, steal? What then, would that look like if we did that to ourselves? I can think of some examples.  What about you? I bet you can.  I can even think of a pretty good word to fit some of them: Denial.  Hang on to that one, for a minute.  Still, fair enough.  We can cross our own personal boundaries.

Next question.  Knowing that to be true, is it intentional or unintentional? Are we aware that we are doing these things to ourselves? That’s maybe a bit of a toughie.

I think it would depend a lot upon the amount of insight that we have about our own personal beings.  If you don’t know what “law” you are breaking in the first place, then presumably it would be “unintentional?” However, might you quickly learn due to the consequences of your actions, “Oh, shit!” Thus, by doing it again (…and again…and again…you may need several lessons), you finally clue in that you’re screwing yourself over big time?

Repeating those actions? Ahhhh…  Are you still struggling with the intentional or the unintentional, question? Well, we can always come up with excuses.  Excuses are reasons, yes, but they are also the cornerstones of denial.  Eventually, you have to own up for your behaviour.  It can be an extremely, painful process.  But it is an absolutely, necessary one.

Turn it around to crossing boundaries with others.  Do you want to be some irresponsible, asshole? Never apologize for hurting someone else’s feelings? Well, that is your choice.  It is also your choice to treat yourself in the same manner.  True, it is very easy (at least for me), to be an unapologetic, asshole to myself! I refuse to be that way to others, though.

From the (and I won’t say arguably as it is?) the most historically, debated publication ever written: The Bible! An excerpt from The Lord’s Prayer:

“…forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive them that trespass against us…”

We need not practise any religion to heed this.  We only need to note that we definitely can commit transgressions against ourselves, and cross our own personal boundaries.  Perhaps we should all try to work on that, just as hard as avoiding crossing other peoples’ boundaries.  I know I could probably benefit from it.

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