Should I be surprised? Let’s toss a cycling spree into the mix of my life, now.  Yesterday, I did something good? I made a tiny bit of progress? Perhaps?

Today, I woke up feeling like I didn’t care if I lived or died.  At school, I felt up and was engaging in playful banter.  Was I faking it? I have no clue.  On the way home, I was extremely anxious, so pop a Valium/Diazepam to try and take care of that.

I’m not done yet…  Recall the fact I’m an Ultradian Cycler!

While waiting for a bus, I think of some things I have to do, and whip out my binder and a pen.  I start maniacally scrawling down sentences.  Some for something I actually need to do, and some for…well, some really good lines that I could insert into some story I may write someday?

Walking home, I actually do something I need to do.  Also, recall here, that I have had zero motivation to do anything for how long? I make an appt. with my Hair Guru.  I am in desperate need of a haircut! I also need it for Clinic (which I am still terrified of starting!)

I then finally arrive home.  I begin shaking and nearly burst into sobs.  I am currently sitting with the most crazed expression on my face.  It is so crazed, I can feel it.  I don’t even have to look in the mirror!

Now, I feel like shit again.  I cannot think.  I’m waiting for my mind to split into two…or three…or four…  Let’s see how long this lasts.

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