Archive for June 9th, 2010


So, she thinks I’m going to gain weight, does she? Well, admittedly, I’d really like to get back to that 100lb. “benchmark.”  Actually, I don’t know if it’s such a benchmark, at all, since I don’t exactly “fluctuate.”  No, if anything, I simply remain there or, as now, have a drastic, and rather: “Danger Will Robinson!” sort of drop.

I saw my new Dietician on Monday.  She’s very nice.  However, I’m not so sure there’s much we can do–except for what I would like to achieve, above.  As I told her, I strongly suspect I will remain at 100lbs. for the rest of my life! Why shouldn’t I? Ever since I became so disgustingly ill (when was it now…four years ago…five?) I never managed to get back up from 90lbs. to 100lbs.  Currently, I’m still sitting around 93lbs. or a pound higher? A bit difficult to tell with clothes.

It’s not so much the types of food I’m eating.  They’re fine.  I just need to try and eat more of them.  This “revelation” was hardly that to me.  However, the idea is to spread the food out in smaller portions during the day.  Again, another revelation that was nothing more than a basic dietary “solution” to my problem(s.)  Fine.

So, as of today, I have decided to follow her advice as best I can.  She said it would be difficult at first.  I told her a couple of things that would make that an ironclad guarantee! Number one is that I never wake up hungry enough for breakfast, and number two is that I’ve always been a small eater.  You would think the latter would help her approach, but not so.

As of today, Day One of trying to be good, oh, difficult indeed! I woke up and had some oatmeal before tea.  I now feel like I am going to pass out and die.  Yes, despite my beloved tea.  I am tired and rather…I don’t know.  Stressed? Feeling overwhelmed? *nods*  However, on top of that, I feel like I’m going to throw up.  And, yes, pass out.

I only had a small bowl of oatmeal.  Quite a few hours ago.  Since it has now been quite a few hours, I am “due” to eat a small meal or even something…not so small? I don’t think so.  I can barely lift my head.

Oatmeal doesn’t do this to a person.  No.  It may be time for some Gravol and beddy? *winces*