Or, you could say “relapses” as I seem to have figured out. Slowly. I’m being rather more than the obsessive, medical, note taker than I usually am regarding my diagnoses. This I always do, as far as tracking any issues, or when more significant KABOOMS occur. Yes, a “Medical Kaboom” does exist. It is not specific to any discipline, but is most thoroughly covered in Surgery 101.
So, as per the title of this post, that’s why I haven’t been around. Your, “So?” What’s going on, right?
Today, it has been almost three weeks to the day, of being back on my regular dose of my Clobazam/Frisium (60mg.) I lost it all right at the beginning of June. What day is it today? August 6th. I mentioned something earlier about retrograde amnesia problems, but they are pretty minor–yes? Well, they are definitely minor compared to short term! Someone will tell me to do something, and within 5 seconds, I’ll forget!
Now, after these three weeks? There was a little improvement. Although, I just knew. In my head, I knew this would be a LONG recovery.
I could eat a bit better (some things are still off limits.) The breakthrough seizures had stopped (at least as far as I could tell?) However, I was still captive to the withdrawal signs and symptoms which are pretty awful sometimes. The only HUGE unknown was the Typical Absence Status Epilepticus. That is primarily why I take this drug. I need it. Desperately. Without it, I cannot leave my bed for two weeks every month. For me it is catamenial (due to your period.) Moreover, for lucky me, it is both when I get my period and ovulate.
Dropping the med cold turkey completely messed with my hormones for the first month, June. I was wondering if it would continue into July. No. I got my period. First Blitz Attack!!! I had no damn clue. Other than the fact I eventually figured it felt like I was dealing with both the TASE problems, and the withdrawal at the same time.
Fast forward a couple of weeks or so. Where I kind of am now. As bloody awful as it’s been (and maybe still is?) I never would have figured it out. Triple Whammy. The breakthrough seizures are now back with the TASE. I can now definitely distinguish the TASE from the withdrawal, that I am still dealing with.
The breakthrough seizures this time? A Simple partial in my legs before going to sleep one night, waking up after having a tonic-clonic another night, and this is something I have NEVER had to do in my life! It’s a good thing I have two? That would be Wonder Cane and his brother. A damn good thing I just happened to have both by my bed!
I had to get up and go to the bathroom the other night. I grabbed Wonder Cane’s brother (he was the closest.) Oh, holy hell. Even though I was barely awake and totally out of it, my brain was screaming: “Todd’s paresis!!! Todd’s paresis!!! I’m gonna go down like a tonne of bricks and be shattered all over the floor!!!” I grabbed Wonder Cane.
I found it a very strange feeling to have to walk with two canes. A lot of people can tend to use canes wrong. Or maybe “backwards” is a better way to say it. You use the cane to support, or “in place of,” your injured leg. When you walk, the cane is placed alongside that leg. Well, here I am trying to get two canes going and coordinated with near paralytic legs! I still think it’s pretty amazing I didn’t end up shattered all over the damn floor!
I suspect that may have been a tonic-clonic, as well. I don’t get Todd’s that like that with any of my other seizures (i.e. so severe and bilaterally.) This led me back to those two weeks before. When on my period, some odd, yet illegible writing on a notepad. That would have been a Complex Partial.