Tomorrow’s the big day. I have compiled all of my notes for my appt. with Non-Arsey Neuro tomorrow. I have also killed a highlighter to draw out the salient points. Why the hell didn’t I just print the reams and reams on bright yellow paper?

Five months of inexplicable insanity. The loss of my Clobazam. Back on my regular dose. Still so damn sick.

I have no idea how much time we’ll have together. There are some other really funky things I actually may have caught. Like myself having a couple of “pure” Absence seizures. I have “disappeared” and it does not fit with any of my epilepsy DP/DR. Not my PTSD dissociation. It’s too brief for a Complex Partial and lacks other features of that kind of seizure for me.

There are so many other bizarre things to cover as well. October has been like some sort of “regression” month. I’m somehow back to being sick in ways I was when things started. Maybe my brain’s just had it and is saying, “Fuck you! Fuck this shit! I’ve had enough until I get more of this drug!!!”

Which will be the entire point of the whole meeting. I already have my number in mind. Not extreme but quick enough to work with, then see if I need to go way over the top.

We’ll see.


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