As per my post on November 11, 2011 “Can’t Find Him” tonight I have learned that my friend, my friend *choking back tears* Died.

I checked and we did have more recent contact than months but it was brief. Very.

I learned quite recently there was a pub nearby where he was spending a lot of time. To go there was my next plan rather than trying to track down his parents I’d never met in the city.

So fucking much for that.

I need to look for any obituaries. *crying now* My “source” is good but did he die when? Or was that the funeral date?

And the cross. His cross. Never, ever picked up from me (always wanted it left with me?)

This may sound awful but I just can’t bear to face his devout Catholic mother. Not as some stranger (Jezebel) who has his cross.

I will keep it. It seems he always wanted me to do so over so many years. Why I have no idea.

Selfish perhaps. But my decision. I feel I “need” it to remember him.

Bless you, sweet G. I love you and never stopped.


  1. Canageek

    Hey. Sorry to hear about your friend. Don’t worry about responding to my letter. I will try and write you a more cheerful on tommorow.


  2. I’m so sorry.


  3. *hugs*

    I’m really sorry :( xxx


  4. Hi Canageek, Butterflywings (@Butterflywgs) and Pandora.

    I hope none of you mind the group response. It really just saves me explaining some further information repeatedly. Also, sorry for the delay to you all, too!

    There was, in fact, more information I learned regarding my friend’s death after I wrote this post. I don’t know if any/most/all of the information I was given was correct or not, but I never would have reached him in time.

    I eventually found a copy of his obituary online, and he actually died before I was told a single thing. So, that’s the end of the story, I guess.

    Much love to you all.


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