Archive for the ‘Blogging’ Category
Well, I can try. Second night at Dad’s now. My sister and uncle just blasted into the room as she flew in from across the country. Things are now getting more and more stressful as I’m coming face to face with extended family members I kicked them out of my life (including my father in the next room.) I did so because they would give you Ebola through a simple phone call.
When I saw my sister, I started crying because I haven’t seen her a bajillion years. She was pretty cold, ambivalent maybe? Both? She did complement my shoes.
Still running on fumes. Actually had a full meal today. For dinner a Bison Burger! Welcome to Canada! You wouldn’t see that on every restaurant menu though.
Tomorrow I have to go the Funeral Home with my sister and pay for the Cremation. A financial glitch, but I would have done it anyway! She was my mother!
I’ll get reimbursed. It will be covered by a Government Pension Mom was receiving. Of course, I know to get a Death Certificate. When dealing with Estate Laws you ALWAYS get multiple copies of Death Certificates for everything that you have to handle.
I meant to write more about my feelings and emotions. There is just so much going on. A concoction of business, chaos, miscommunication and exhaustion. It doesn’t leave much time for even the slightest pause or glimpse into one’s inner thoughts, and time to reflect upon them. Right now, I’m either the walking dead (bad pun) or functioning on a UFO’s Autopilot System.
I think that says it all.
Although, we could add “Reader’s Cement Truck Pouring Block.” That seems quite reasonable.
But what’s even worse; even more pathetic and frustrating, is that I could “cheat” (or actually beat) my loss of creativity. How? This is where it really hurts.
I could write Posts about some things I’ve done in the past. These things that allow for very simple continuation. Or, they would just simple on their own.
I’ve even written things down! Kind of. So, does that mean I’m only some per centage of getting sucked into the Cement…sand? Uhhh… I just lost my truck of thought…
Am I going to show up on Twitter using WP now? Now? Now? Now? Immediately after I finish typing? Now? Now? N…
After being Referee at the longest, most painful Technological Boxing Match, ever?
Now? Now? Now?
Painful, due to them both pummeling the hell out of the Referee. That was me, remember?
Here we go, you shitbag apps.
Quite easily, appently. As of November, this stupid, damn, insane Blog has managed to exist for 10 stupid, damn, insane years. o_O
I have no idea what to say about that. Well, I suppose I could shout out strings of profanity that make no sense. However, that doesn’t feel so celebratory. You would just find a lot of it here.
Right now, it’s like my Blog isn’t even here. Or it’s made of lace. Or who knows what?
Maybe it’s some kind of dormant monster that’s been waiting to sink its teeth into me. The last thing I’ll see, is the Grim Reaper leaning against my doorway, enjoying a Cuban.
Cigar, that is.
Stranger things could happen. Like me in the Blogosphere for 10 years.
I think I’ve used that before. When things have gone sideways, pear shaped, become frozen, completely imploded, people have been stalking me, I’ve been stalking me and many other things.
Here’s a new one. I’m now visually impaired to some degree, so forget using my Mac. Even tiny mobile screens can become brutal.
“Visually Impaired?” you ask.
Modus diagnosis operandi is Continual Migraines. Shrapnel in my brain, from being admitted to hospital for a Stroke. That was a year ago. Except it wasn’t a Stroke. It just sure as hell looked like one!
So it was probably a TIA then. They can present almost exactly the same way. The primary distinction is no damage or insults to the brain, whereas a Stroke generally shows something when you look at any/all parts of it.
Plus YOU can show a lot after a Stroke.
Well, my brain’s been insulted a lot. By seizures, falls, people telling me I’m stupid, and yes, prior migraines. However, this is a different braingame. Too much.
Migraines can mimic Strokes and TIA’s so I probably didn’t have one of those either. It was “The Migraine Heard Around the World.”
I’m not kidding. I’ve been through a lot of funky medical experiences but this? It was beyond belief. Surreal. My head really did explode. Okay, it didn’t but at the time…you get it. And my eyes. Psychedelic and black vision.
Try to imagine that.
Now, blurry, photophobia, pain cognitive impairment. So, sunglasses, don’t push using my eyes, dimenhydrinate, new med (Beta-blocker Propranolol) and cane.
Now back to my Blog after that fun stuff.
This whole Blog has turned to shit. I honestly think this is the lowest of the low. It’s never been as bad as this.
I don’t have the imagination to imagine conjuring a beginning to begin fixing it. Much less time. The first thing would be my Blogroll.
How many old and dead Blogs are lined up there like ratty, teenage socks, hanging out to dry but they’ll always reek? No doubt more than I already know.
Then, replacements. I’ve met so many great people with amazing Blogs out there. However, due to “Technical Errors” (i.e. I’m a fucking idiot) I never filed them along with my others.
“Look and Feel?” Oh, bloody hell. Just the thought of it makes me feel nauseous. And since I’m sick I’m already nauseous!
The plopping of my current template into (better said ONTO) another template can make you want to heave, simply by looking at it. Run away horrified too.
I haven’t shut everything thing down after so many easy (and difficult) situations. That must mean something. Perhaps the fact, that it’s actually not the lowest of low after all.
Just mentioned on Twitter that I’ve got WP back up and running on my mobile. Hopefully more Posts soon?
I’m just starting Propranolol. Been a month now and the side effects are kicking my ass off. However, in a good way? Like I’m trippin’ out on significant levels of Opiates.
I’m still feeling pretty gonzo with my second dose. I’m 40mg bid now. NOTE: Update Meds Page.
Later. It can wait. I took my second dose not long ago.
Why Propranolol? Based upon a fairly educated guess, I’m now dealing with chronic migraines. It can be used for prevention. Maybe kicked off from when I had every sign of a Stroke, and was chucked into hospital last summer.
Wow! This is a bit of a Post! Writing it when I feel like I’m in between being on Morphine and Heroin.
Not that I’ve done Heroin. Am I spelling it correctly? Have I slept with a Heroine? Do I need one? Holy crap! Damn straight I do! *laughing*
No, I’ve just talked to people who have used it and what it was like for them; what they experienced. Did I ever find out what some people can experience!
Utterly fascinating! I realized why so many people could become addicted to it.
I’ll also say it’s utterly fascinating why I’m getting stoned out my mind. Well, it is to me because I really get off on Pharmacokinetics.
I’ve gone through every med I take and found the answer. Plus extra stuff which is just icing on the cake.
Super-awesome Post to write, but hells bells no, not now! I can’t even handle this screen anymore.
Have you ever wanted to write a Blog Post and you just can’t do it. I mean, you really want to do it. You HAVE to do it.
If you don’t, you’re going to totally blow up, go insane, disintegrate into pieces, or you have no clue.
Because you’re too “preoccupied” with the Post you HAVE TO WRITE!!!
Well, there’s both the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea! It’s called your head!
Because there’s nothing you can do but let those seething, boiling waves drown it over and over with your thoughts. The thoughts you want to get out so bad, you would trade choking on them, just to make it happen.
I’m choking, but nothing’s happening. Except for this. And clearly it’s not what I want to talk about? Yes? Well, if it wasn’t clear, there you go.
So my brain is trying to keep it’s head(?) above all of that water. So many thoughts churning around and I’m trying so hard to get a grip. Find the sandy beach.
Hell, I’ll even choke on the sand if that would help!
Where’s Spock? He’s always my good side at sorting these things out.